Girl Scout Cookies

April 1, 2010

MY GRADE:

Little question for you…

Why are girl scouts still selling those awful cookies?  Are they trying to collectively knock us off as a nation?  It’s certainly possible.   If you take a look at the side of any box of their cookies you may start to see some validity to my theory: Read the rest of this entry »


Raw Food: America’s Bull Penis

March 19, 2010

MY GRADE:

It’s amazing to me how the concept of “food” varies so drastically from one culture to the next.

As Socrates once blogged “One country’s insect infestation is another country’s feast.”  (And by “Socrates” I mean “me”)

Some of us look at a bull’s penis and think “Wow, that is a large penis.  I better stay away from that. ” Others, in Taiwan, for instance,  look at it and think Man, I’m gettin’ hungry.

(And still others look at a bull’s penis and think “Hey, great blog topic!”) Read the rest of this entry »


Salsa Bars

February 25, 2010

MY GRADE:

An interesting aspect of the “healthy fast food” phenomenon is the proliferation of salsa bars. God only knows why we’re so smitten.  If someone had told me 20 years ago that I would choose one restaurant over another because they allowed me an unlimited supply of free condiments to take home in tiny plastic cups I wouldn’t have believed them.  But I guess, when it comes down to it, free salsa is like a Happy Meal for adults. Read the rest of this entry »


Chuck E Cheese-related crime

December 16, 2009

I need to interrupt my thrice-weekly hilarious satirical commentary to shed some light on a newly-raging social dilemma —  Chuck E Cheese-related crime.

Here are the facts: Read the rest of this entry »


The McRib

November 18, 2009

MY GRADE:

As I dialed past Sarah Palin on her 39th talk show appearance of the day (plugging her new book The Palin Vampire Diaries) I couldn’t help but develop an appreciation for those in the past who have taken the less-is-more approach to product hawking.

Of course, I’m talking about the McRib. Read the rest of this entry »


Dr. Pepper

November 15, 2009

MY GRADE: starstarstarhalfblank

Soft drink or hair tonic?

Tasty and Refreshing. With just a hint of... um... ???

(NOTE: When I speak of Dr. Pepper I am referring to Mr. Pibb too. Because to me Mr. Pibb is basically Dr. Pepper without the doctorate)

Soft drink companies have never been completely comfortable with owning up to what their products are:  a 100% artificial concoction. Read the rest of this entry »


Supermarkets (Panic in Aisle 7)

November 9, 2009

MY GRADE: starhalfblankblankblank

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I dread going to the supermarket.

Why?

Well, here’s just a mini sample-size of my supermarket issues:

Things I don’t understand about modern food: Read the rest of this entry »